


The "I'm Not Dating a Superhero" Club

by JazzGirl123



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, nino and nathanael are trying their BEST
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-09
Updated: 2018-02-09
Packaged: 2019-03-16 01:52:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13626057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JazzGirl123/pseuds/JazzGirl123
Summary: What do you do when you find out your classmate is a superhero? Take a long nap and hope you get a break real soon.





	The "I'm Not Dating a Superhero" Club

He must have done something terrible in his past life. Maybe he kicked a puppy, or accidentally tried to start World War III.

It must have been pretty bad though, or else he wouldn’t be punished like this.

“I really don’t know where Chloe is, ma’am!” Sabrina insisted, hands wringing nervously as her science teacher loomed over her. “She must have a good reason for not being in class!”

Madame Mendeleiev’s frown only deepened.

“She didn’t seem to have one in collège so I sincerely doubt she has one not involving shopping now,” she replied, ignoring how her students shifted awkwardly. “You all are in lycée now! You do not have the luxury of skipping class and relying on your  _ connections  _ to get you through school.”

Sabrina shrunk under her intimidating gaze, glancing worriedly at her phone that sat on the lab desk nearby.

“So I will ask you again, Sabrina,” said Mendeleiev, voice filled with irritation and warning. “Is there a reason Chloe is nearly forty minutes late to my class?”

“It - It must be because of the akuma attack,” sputtered Sabrina. “The one across the city…”

“If those two-” Mendeleiev gestured to a fidgeting Marinette and Adrien nearby, “-can make it in time for class, and goodness knows how late  _ they  _ always are, then Chloe can as well. Try again.”

Sabrina bit down on her lip, clearly trying to find some sort of an excuse to save her best friend, and glanced back at her other classmates for help despite knowing she wouldn’t get it. Not many people had sympathy for Chloe Bourgeois, after all.

But still. 

Someone had to do it.

“She’s hiding out again,” spoke Nathanael, clenching his pen tightly. “I saw her run back home after the attack.”

Mendeleiev turned her attention to him, hands on her hips.

“And why would she do that?” 

“Well, this akuma  _ was  _ targeting her,” replied the artist. “I just imagine that after being a target for, what, three years? She must not want to risk coming back right away.”

He actually had no idea where Chloe was at the moment, but he at least knew the real reason she was running late. Queen B was a lot of things, but punctual was not one of them.

It had never been his intention to find out about the blonde girl’s heroic double life, but she was  _ terrible  _ about hiding it from the public. Really, she was just lucky it had been him who had found her.

Mendeleiev narrowed her eyes at him, and he blinked back as innocently as he could. 

“Very well. I will allow it this once as a warning, but someone let Chloe know next time she skips class, akuma or not, she will get a detention,” she warned, looking between Sabrina and Nathanael. “Do I make myself clear?”

Sabrina was giving him a strange look, he knew without looking at her, but she managed to answer their teacher.

“Yes, ma’am! I’ll be sure to let Chloe know right away!” She assured. 

Nathanael went back to doodling in the margins of his notes, only to close his eyes and silently count to ten when he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. A quick glance at the screen told him it was the blonde heroine herself, and he sighed softly.

He silenced his phone and, making sure Mendeleiev was focused on the lesson, opened up a new chatroom.

_ YOU: I’m going to start charging you for this - what are you doing?? _

_ CHLOE: Fixing my hair, duh. Can’t show up with some wild hairdo, no matter how good I look with it.  _

_ YOU: You got your honey stuck in your hair again, didn’t you? _

_ CHLOE: … _

_ YOU: where are you? _

_ CHLOE: locker room … hurry up already _

Nathanael sighed as he quietly excused himself from the room, grabbing the bathroom pass as he went by Mendeleiev’s desk. 

“I really should charge you for this,” he remarked as he entered the locker room, which was empty with the exception of the teenage girl and her amused kwami. “I thought you said you were getting better at that - are your hands stuck in your hair?”

Chloe glowered at him from her seat on the bench. 

“Oh, shut up,” she snapped. “I’m going to master this and then I won’t need you trailing after me like a lost puppy.”

“Chloe,” chided Pollen, “be nice. And if you practice a bit more, you’ll get the hang of Hive Shoot in no problem.”

Nathanael sighed as he went over to the heroine, taking her by the elbow and leading her to the showers.

“Come on, Your Majesty,” he said dryly, turning the water on. “Is your phone on you?”

“No, why- _ what the hell?! _ ”

Chloe shrieked as she was shoved under the running showerhead, the hot water pouring down on her in an instant. 

“You act like this is our first time doing this,” remarked Nathanael, going to where Pollen was. “Where’s her stuff?”

Pollen smiled and ducked into a nearby locker, opening it up for him. The artist hummed as he dug into Chloe’s bag to her shampoo, walking back over to her.

Chloe glowered at him, blue eyes filled with disdain.

“If my hands weren’t stuck to my hair, I would be crossing my arms at you,” she told him, watching as he took his jacket off. “What are you  _ doing _ ?”

“You think I want to get my clothes wet?” Nathanael said, sighing as he put the shampoo bottle on the bench. “Stand still. And keep your eyes closed.”

He reached up and gently ran his fingers through her hair, doing his best not to tug on it so he could free her hands. Ignoring the honey that came into contact with his own skin, he carefully washed away the main globs of it.

Once enough of it was gone, Nathanael reached for the shampoo and massaged some on, humming softly as the honey practically melted away. After a few moments, Chloe managed to move her hands away and let them dangle uselessly at her side.

“You’re quiet today,” commented Nathanael, glancing down at her face. “This is usually the part where you yell at me for not treating your ‘precious’ head with more care and not to use so much shampoo because, and I quote, ‘one bottle costs more than my entire worth’.”

Chloe scrunched up her nose.

“I’m standing in the girls’ locker room, showering with my clothes still on, and forced to be around some mop-headed wannabe artist. At this point, I just want this to be done with,” she said. 

Nathanael shrugged as he finished washing her hair.

“Consider your wish granted.” He turned the water off and handed her a towel before he stepped back. “Your backup clothes are in your bag.”

Chloe frowned as she dried her hair.

“When did I put backup clothes in?”

“You didn’t. Pollen stole your extra key from Sabrina and told me to go get-you know what, it doesn’t matter,” replied Nathanael. “Mendeleiev is pissed, by the way, so try not to miss any more of her classes. And everyone thinks you’re hiding in your room because Fanamania was chasing you.”

“Your excuse is that I’m acting like a coward?” Chloe scoffed. “As if. When do I run away from trouble? It’s literally my job to run  _ into  _ it.”

She peeled off her jacket, and Nathanael swiftly turned his eyes up to the ceiling.

“Well, sure, but no one can know that, can they? It’s  _ my  _ job to keep your secret safe, apparently,” he said. “In case you forgot, you ran into the first room you saw and  _ transformed without checking to see if it was empty _ .”

“I’m not a child,” she snapped. “Don’t lecture me. It’s not like you  _ have  _ to do any of this so stop acting like I’m forcing you into it.”

Nathanael blinked and then grabbed his jacket.

“You’re right -  _ for once _ ,” he remarked. “You have fun with all of this, Chloe.”

He turned to leave, then stopped to get something out of his jacket pocket. With a sigh, he pulled out a bag of sour candy, placing it by Pollen.

“Here, you need your energy,” he said before he finally left. 

It was only when he was halfway back to class when he realized some honey had gotten stuck to his shirt, and his front was partially wet from the shower.

“Crap.” Nathanael ducked into the bathroom to dry off, knowing Mendeleiev would only question him if he showed up like this, and caught wind of some boys talking.

“Did you see Chat Noir today? He was kickass as always.”

“Well, sure, but that’s expected. He and Ladybug have been at this game for years. The real disaster was  _ Queen B _ .”

“Oh, yeah! It was like she didn’t know what she was doing!”

“What a total  _ wannabee _ . Get it?”

“Dude, no.”

Nathanael, who had been trying to scrub off the honey, paused as he glanced at the two boys.

“Knock it off, you guys,” he said, voice full of tiredness. “She’s trying her best.”

“Didn’t realize you had a thing for clumsy blondes, Natty.”

“Yeah, sorry to insult your  _ girlfriend _ .”

The two boys exchanged laughs as they left the bathroom, and Nathanael sighed as he threw away his napkins. He needed a drink. Pretty sure there was a vending machine in the hallway.

“Great, I really can’t escape superheroes,” he groaned as he stepped out, only to blink at the sight in front of him.

Nino, arms full of what  _ looked  _ like Alya’s clothes, stared at him, wide-eyed. For a second, the artist swore a tiny fox was peeking from his pockets.

“I can explain,” he sputtered. “The - The akuma attack and Alya had to - I mean, something came up-”

Nathanael held up his hands, suddenly having the urge to take a long, long nap. 

“I don’t care anymore. I’ll pretend I didn’t see anything. I’m going back to class.”

He massaged the brim of his nose as he brushed past the DJ, who merely ducked into the bathroom.

Yeah. He must have done something  _ really  _ terrible in his last life to deal with this.


End file.
